boeshane_boy

We missed you that first day. Martha talked to me about it. But it didn't seem suspicious at first. We thought you wanted to be left alone. [He let his fingers slide up Jack's cheek into his hair.] I'm sorry it was so long. I had to look everywhere first and then... find someone to help me.

Why does it sound like you're trying to take the blame? [His hand slid to the back of Armand's neck.] I'm not angry with you.

I love you. I was scared... and Vidal doesn't even consider me a man. [His voice is shaking with restrained emotion, likely his anger.] I've nowhere else to put it except back on myself.

You're more man than him, [he said with a wry smile, toying with the ends of his hair.] I wish we had a shooting range, [Jack mused. That's good catharsis.]

So are you. [He shakes his head at the idea of the shooting range, though it might work for Jack.] My anger isn't violent. But my arguments fell on deaf ears. It's so frustrating. Why do people only understand pain and violence.

And he hurt you! He killed you, didn't he?

[He bit back something bitter about the nature of humans, shaking his head instead. Jack cupped his cheek again.] Yeah. But I always come back, good as new.

Except inside. [Armand didn't duck away, but he made an effort to hide his unhappiness with the situation again.] I--None of this should be about me, but I feel as if I've failed you, and you won't even show me what's wrong.

[He took a deep breath.] Let's have tea then and talk of happier times, perhaps to come.

[Oh. Boy. Jack made no move to go sit, just stood there, close to Armand. He said nothing for a long few moments.]

I've been alive for thousands of years. I've loved a lot of people, and I've lost most of them. [He stepped back, wandering the room slowly, pausing in front of a mirror.] you know, when the Admiral came to me, I thought this was perfect. Everyone's like me here.

[Jack shook his head, and turned to look at Armand.] I think I need to leave.

[Armand didn't move to follow Jack at first, just turned to watch where he went.] No, you can't go! [He ran up to Jack, grabbing the material of his shirt.]

You can't leave me here... [He could think of nothing to say that would express the horrible pain he felt at the idea of being abandoned here again.]

[Jack swallowed hard, turning to look at Armand. He reached for the other man's hand, holding it in his, against his chest. He didn't want to let go.] I can't stay, Armand.

[Armand's feelings were too strong for him to stop the tears.] Why can't you stay? I never expected forever, or even an entire year, but it's been such a short time! How can I give back to you what you've given to me if I don't have time? Just a few more months...

[His throat worked, and Jack wrapped both arms around Armand, holding him tightly.] I can't. [He pressed his chin against Armand's shoulder.] I need to go home. I need to - to remember why I stayed there so long. Armand, I can't help anyone here. I'm just hiding.

[It was hard not simply to cry.] Where's home? You can help. You helped me.

Earth. [His voice was tight; Jack was trying not to cry.] Cardiff - maybe. I don't know, I don't know, Armand. I don't care about my inmate, and I don't want to. I can't stay here.

[Armand was crying, had been crying almost since Jack had first spoken. His difficulty was in keeping talking.] Then take me with you, just for a little while. Show me your home, Jack. Your world. I can come back here later.

I'm not ready to lose you.

[It was tempting. Jack closed his eyes, but he didn't let go of Armand.] I don't think that's a good idea.

[He couldn't speak for a moment, his face pressed against Jack's chest, his arms wrapped tight around him.]

Why not?

It's not - it's not your time, Armand, it's a different world.

This isn't my time either! [There were hardly any tears in his voice, and when he looked up at Jack, he'd set his jaw in his own stubborn way.] I've learned things. I wouldn't have to stand out as that very different.

I'm still not asking for forever.

[What was he supposed to do? Say no, leave Armand here, risk Vidal hurting him? Or take him with him, back to Earth, to Cardiff. To whatever was left of Torchwood. To where he'd spent so much time with Ianto. No, he didn't want that. But there were other places. Jack swallowed hard.]

Okay. [His stomach clenched, not sure if this was a mistake or not.]

[Mentally Armand was preparing other arguments, looking for possible allies to help him with his case, but then he heard. He hugged Jack tighter.] Thank you.

[Then he stretched upward to try to kiss Jack.]

[Jack shifted to meet that kiss, cupping Armand's face. He could make this work. And maybe he could talk himself into looking up Gwen when he went. Check on Rhys and the baby. Maybe she'd only slap him a few times.]

[Relief poured into Armand from that kiss. He finally had to take a break to breathe.] How long before you go... before we go?

[He wanted to go right now, but had to reason with himself; there would be things to take care of. People to talk to. Jack frowned, thinking.] A few days. End of the week.

[Armand nodded.] Then there's no reason we can't sit down to that tea and... talk. I'll need to make arrangements, too. Talk to the Admiral.

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