Well, Barge. It's been fun. [No. No it has not.] It's about time I head on my way. You know, feed that traveling itch. Get the hell away from this particular brand of insanity. I'd rather take a Nostrovite right now. Another go with Aboddon would be better.

Someone get an eye on Vidal; he's got a case of homophobia like I haven't seen since World War II. He doesn't bat an eye at torture, either; trust me on that.

Doctors, it's been a pleasure. [Except for the part where he's still blaming him for Ianto's death. But hey, why be bitter.] Take care of yourselves, everybody. Play some strip twister in my name.

Armand's coming with me, by the way; a modern world tour's starting to sound pretty good. He'll be back. I won't.

(((Aaaand once goodbyes and/or hugs are had - spam is awesome - and Armand's affairs are in order, Jack's peacing out with him. It's been awesome, guys, thanks for being my Jack test drive. <3)))

Well that was fun. [Note that he doesn't sound like he's been having fun at all.] Nothing like a few teenage hormones to give us all a weekend off, huh?

[Private to Armand]

Did Vidal hurt you? Are you okay? I didn't see you during the flood.

Ladies, gentlemen, I feel like it's introduction time. My name is Jack Harkness. Some of you old timers may remember that epic capture the flag game a few years ago that earned me the nickname Captain - newbies, feel free to use it. It doesn't matter that you weren't there to see me in all my glory; I'm sure you'll see it this summer soon enough.

Now, I've been coming here for years and years, so if you have any questions at all, come ask me. I'll set you straight, maybe over lunch. My ghost stories will keep you up for weeks, though - fair warning. Smores usually help.

Girls, boys - summer's the time to loosen up and try new things. New hobbies, new sports, new opportunities. I'm all about giving you those opportunities.

All right, I think it's been long enough.

Captain Sergei Vidal! Hi. I'm Captain Jack Harkness. Pleasure to meet you, really. I'm thinking we should talk.

[Private to Vampire Armand]

If you ever touch St. Just again, I will make what you've done in the past two days look like child's play, do you understand me?

Couldn't wait a couple days so I don't have to

Admiral, bring the Master back. Better be the last time I have to

So. Something weird's going on with the journals.

[This is his I'm okay guys but not really post. :|]

[Private to the Admiral]

You need to split us up. It's not funny, it was never funny. I want a new inmate, and if he's ever going to graduate, he needs a new warden. Split us up.

All right, that's it.

The Master's still in Zero as far as I know. I don't I'm not dealing with kids. If someone else wants to change his diaper, go for it. Just leave me out of it.

Someone get down here before I kill him again.

I'm running out of bullets.

(((Backdated to after this log. Jack's been killing the Master. A lot. BOY IS LOSING IT.)))